Post by Dan Rather on Sept 17, 2004 8:26:13 GMT -5
Good Morning, Dan Rather reporting. They are a well known group who recently won a tournament in the topsy-turvy world of Nova's Lightning 3; the Predators. And now, I have in my hands documents proving that they have cheated on multiple occasions. One of these documents shows in 1999 that Hatchet was asked to take an anti-cheat exam; but was unable to do so and did not meet the community standards. It even shows that he was given preferential treatment by Crazy Marlin, the ringleader of this group. These documents are authentic. I spent an entire two minutes on the phone discussing them with my expert and he said he could verify their authenticity without even seeing them...they are just that authentic. These documents came into my possession through the not-for-profit, non-partisan group called "Nova Players Who Hate PR and Want to See Them Suffer". Obviously, there would be no bias here and they have nothing to gain through this reporting. PR had no comment on the documents; we didn't ask them for one. However, I did get a chance to speak to my good friend, the Senator from Massachusetts, John Kerry. Here is the exclusive interview:
RATHER: Hello, John. How are you?
KERRY: Great, thanks Dan.
RATHER: By the way, how is my daughter doing since she has been working for the Democratic National Committee?
KERRY: She is doing great, and if we win the election in November, I have a great spot for her lined up in my administration.
RATHER: That is super news. So, let's get to it. What do you think of this PR incident?
KERRY: Well, its grim, Dan. The authenticity of the documents does not matter, its the seriousness of the charge. Whether the accusations are true or not, PR needs to answer for this.
RATHER: John, what would you have done differently that could have changed the current situation with PR?
KERRY: I would have done things differently.
RATHER: What types of things?
KERRY: Things.
RATHER: Right...
KERRY: Lots of things.
RATHER: Right... Now John, PR has been in every RAW tournament in L3 since 1999...
KERRY: You know I voted for PR being in tournaments, before I voted against it. And when they were admitted in, I voted against funding for their F-22s.
RATHER: Of course, this is well known. You yourself won some L3 tournies.
KERRY: Yes, and I gave back the trappings, awards and medals, that represented the game. In defiance, I threw them back to Nova.
RATHER: How many of these trappings?
KERRY: I don't recall exactly, five, or six, or nine.
RATHER: Of course. And you feel you can well represent the Nova community?
KERRY: Of course. As you know I still have several awards and medals I received for my time, roughly four months, in Nova. And several of my Nova comrades stand with me on this.
RATHER: An excellent record indeed. What is your plan to rid Nova of cheating?
KERRY: Cheating, in all forms, is deplorable, and must be stopped.
RATHER: And what is your plan for this?
KERRY: We will stop them.
RATHER: Brilliant. What about the spending that the current administration has been doing on stopping cheating in Nova?
KERRY: We must spend as much as we can to stop this cheating.
RATHER: And what about the defecit we have now?
KERRY: If we didn't spend so much to stop the cheating, we would not have a defecit. $200 billion to stop cheating, but no money for private airfields on Martha's Vineyards? $200 billion to stop cheating, but no money for tax cuts on large luxury yachts? We must stop spending money to stop cheating and concentrate on problems at home.
RATHER: You are correct on that. What is your plan to cut spending?
KERRY: We plan to cut spending to build a stronger Nova.
RATHER: What types of things will you do?
KERRY: Things.
RATHER: Right.
KERRY: Lots of things....
RATHER: Hello, John. How are you?
KERRY: Great, thanks Dan.
RATHER: By the way, how is my daughter doing since she has been working for the Democratic National Committee?
KERRY: She is doing great, and if we win the election in November, I have a great spot for her lined up in my administration.
RATHER: That is super news. So, let's get to it. What do you think of this PR incident?
KERRY: Well, its grim, Dan. The authenticity of the documents does not matter, its the seriousness of the charge. Whether the accusations are true or not, PR needs to answer for this.
RATHER: John, what would you have done differently that could have changed the current situation with PR?
KERRY: I would have done things differently.
RATHER: What types of things?
KERRY: Things.
RATHER: Right...
KERRY: Lots of things.
RATHER: Right... Now John, PR has been in every RAW tournament in L3 since 1999...
KERRY: You know I voted for PR being in tournaments, before I voted against it. And when they were admitted in, I voted against funding for their F-22s.
RATHER: Of course, this is well known. You yourself won some L3 tournies.
KERRY: Yes, and I gave back the trappings, awards and medals, that represented the game. In defiance, I threw them back to Nova.
RATHER: How many of these trappings?
KERRY: I don't recall exactly, five, or six, or nine.
RATHER: Of course. And you feel you can well represent the Nova community?
KERRY: Of course. As you know I still have several awards and medals I received for my time, roughly four months, in Nova. And several of my Nova comrades stand with me on this.
RATHER: An excellent record indeed. What is your plan to rid Nova of cheating?
KERRY: Cheating, in all forms, is deplorable, and must be stopped.
RATHER: And what is your plan for this?
KERRY: We will stop them.
RATHER: Brilliant. What about the spending that the current administration has been doing on stopping cheating in Nova?
KERRY: We must spend as much as we can to stop this cheating.
RATHER: And what about the defecit we have now?
KERRY: If we didn't spend so much to stop the cheating, we would not have a defecit. $200 billion to stop cheating, but no money for private airfields on Martha's Vineyards? $200 billion to stop cheating, but no money for tax cuts on large luxury yachts? We must stop spending money to stop cheating and concentrate on problems at home.
RATHER: You are correct on that. What is your plan to cut spending?
KERRY: We plan to cut spending to build a stronger Nova.
RATHER: What types of things will you do?
KERRY: Things.
RATHER: Right.
KERRY: Lots of things....
