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Post by TómmÿGûñz™ \PR/ on Jun 27, 2005 14:15:47 GMT -5
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Post by PenPusher on Jul 5, 2005 11:43:32 GMT -5
You know you're living in 2005 when... 1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave. 2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years. 3.You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3. 4. You e-mail your mate who works at the desk next to you. 5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends is that they do not have e-mail addresses. 6. When you go home after a long day at work you still answer the phone in a business manner. 7. When you make phone calls from home, you accidentally dial "0" or "9" to get an outside line. 8. You've sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three different companies. 10. You learn about your redundancy on the 11 o'clock news. 11. Your boss doesn't have the ability to do your job. 12. Contractors out number permanent staff and are more likely to get long-service awards. AND THE REAL CLINCHERS ARE... 13. You read this entire list, and kept nodding and smiling. 14. As you read this list, you think about forwarding it to your "friends". 15. You got this email from a friend that never talks to you anymore, except to send you jokes from the net. 16. You are too busy to notice there was no No. 9. 17. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a No.9. 18. And now you are laughing at yourself! Finally, you fwd this to your friends......  |
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Post by Crazy Marlin \PR/ on Jul 5, 2005 18:41:13 GMT -5
Bastard...
Hate it when I fall for stuff...
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Post by Hatchet\PR/ on Aug 7, 2005 14:19:06 GMT -5
LAST WEEK WAS MY BIRTHDAY AND I DIDN'T FEEL VERY WELL WAKING UP THAT
MORNING. I WENT DOWNSTAIRS FOR BREAKFAST HOPING MY WIFE WOULD BE PLEASANT
AND SAY, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!", AND POSSIBLY HAVE A PRESENT FOR ME.
AS IT TURNED OUT, SHE BARELY SAID GOOD MORNING, LET ALONE "HAPPY BIRTHDAY."
I THOUGHT... WELL, THAT'S MARRIAGE FOR YOU, BUT THE KIDS WILL REMEMBER. MY
KIDS CAME INTO BREAKFAST AND DIDN'T SAY A WORD.
SO WHEN I LEFT FOR THE OFFICE, I WAS FEELING PRETTY LOW AND SOMEWHAT
DESPONDENT.
AS I WALKED INTO MY OFFICE, MY SECRETARY JANE SAID, "GOOD MORNING, BOSS,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" IT FELT A LITTLE BETTER THAT AT LEAST SOMEONE HAD
REMEMBERED.
I WORKED UNTIL ONE O'CLOCK AND THEN JANE KNOCKED ON MY DOOR AND SAID, "YOU
KNOW, IT'S SUCH A BEAUTIFUL DAY OUTSIDE, AND IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY, LET'S GO
OUT TO LUNCH, JUST YOU AND ME." I SAID, "THANKS JANE, THAT'S THE GREATEST
THING I'VE HEARD ALL DAY. LET'S GO!"
WE WENT TO LUNCH. BUT WE DIDN'T GO WHERE WE NORMALLY WOULD GO. WE DINED
INSTEAD AT A LITTLE PLACE WITH A PRIVATE TABLE. WE HAD TWO MARTINIS EACH AND
I ENJOYED THE MEAL TREMENDOUSLY.
ON THE WAY BACK TO THE OFFICE, JANE SAID, "YOU KNOW, IT'S SUCH A BEAUTIFUL
DAY... WE DON'T NEED TO GO BACK TO THE OFFICE, DO WE?" I RESPONDED, "I GUESS
NOT. WHAT DO YOU HAVE IN MIND?" SHE SAID, "LET'S GO TO MY APARTMENT."
AFTER ARRIVING AT HER APARTMENT JANE TURNED TO ME AND SAID, "BOSS, IF YOU
DON'T MIND, I'M GOING TO STEP INTO THE BEDROOM FOR A MOMENT. I'LL BE RIGHT
BACK."
"OK." I NERVOUSLY REPLIED.
SHE WENT INTO THE BEDROOM AND, AFTER A COUPLE OF MINUTES, SHE CAME OUT
CARRYING A HUGE BIRTHDAY CAKE... FOLLOWED BY MY WIFE, KIDS, AND DOZENS OF MY
FRIENDS AND CO-WORKERS, ALL SINGING "HAPPY BIRTHDAY".
AND I JUST SAT THERE...
ON THE COUCH...
NAKED.
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